One definition of grace, as used in the bible, is a winning quality or attractiveness that invites a favorable reaction — graciousness, attractiveness, charm, winsomeness.
I conclude therefore, I know the grace of God when my thoughts of him lead me to love him, when I see him as winsome.
By and large, the main view of the Western Church has missed this for a long time, teaching directly or indirectly a ‘god’ who is demanding, angry, distant, off-putting (not winsome), using the wrath of God as a fear motivator, instead of revealing the God who is all love, all good, all the time. (Even his ‘wrath’, properly understood, stems from his love and is corrective in nature, in that he lets us have the consequences of our own choices for the purpose of bringing us to a place where we are open to see our need, and open to seeing him as he truly is).
Grace is … good. Grace is attractive. The religious say repent! while non-believers ask why would I? The answer, for those who know him, is “because God is good – taste and see!”
To know him is to love him… to love him in such a way as to want to know him more, to give ourselves to him, voluntarily, willingly, without holding back — because his qualities have invited a favorable reaction from us.